I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
