over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
