I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
