ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
