Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
