The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
