Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
