she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize