but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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