how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
is it fun? or sober?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
