yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Randomize
