He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
