is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
