College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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