its not stalking. its research.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
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