apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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