PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
