He uses pillows to masturbate.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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