Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
