yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
