best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
