i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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