I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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