She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize
