So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
