just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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