at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Pants are for mortals
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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