he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
do herpes really smell.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
ttyl tear gas
sick fucks of a feather flock together
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
