and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I have feelings that need drinking.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize
