so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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