You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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