It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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