Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
