after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize