respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Randomize