you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I DEMAND FORESKIN
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize