Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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