I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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