Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Just puked most of my soul out..
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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