erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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