she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
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