I hate all girls vehemently.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize