Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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