Bisexual people are plain selfish.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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