Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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