the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
