That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm like, not good at living.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
