yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
