When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
