GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
